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I want to be loved, but you don’t seem to love me
I’m wandering aimlessly within this repetition
And the answer I found is only one; that even if I’m scared, even if I’m hurt
I’ll say “I love you” to the person I love

Do you love me? Do you not love me?
As for things like that, it’s fine either way
No matter how much I wish
There are many unchangeable things in this world, right?
That’s right, and simply the reality which says that I love you
Is the truth because it can’t be changed by anybody.

I want to overcome the thousands of nights and tell  you
There’s something that I must tell you
I want to be loved, but you don’t seem to love me
I’m wandering aimlessly within this repetition
And the answer I found is only one; that even if I’m scared, even if I’m hurt
I’ll say “I love you” to the person I love
Putting these feelings into words is such a scary thing
But I’ll say “I love you” to the person I love

In this wide world, I can’t express the joy of encountering you with words very well huh…
That’s why we smile,
And sing do-re-mi in the autumn filled with vivid colors
With winter at our backs, waiting for the sunlight shining through the leaves in spring
To become born anew, in a way that we’re able to protect someone

When I turn back at the road I came from and the way ahead, I always had the eyes of a coward
I want to face you, but I can’t be honest
As for the days I repeated not being able to straightforwardly love the other,
I hated being alone
The me of that day seemed to love in a uninjured way.

I’ll overcome the thousands of nights and head out to meet you right now
There is something that I must tell you
I want to be loved, but you don’t seem to love me
I’m wandering aimlessly within this repetition
And the answer I found is only one; that even if I’m scared, even if I’m hurt
I’ll say “I love you” to the person I love
Even if these feelings aren’t returned, saying “I love you” to the person you love
That is the most beautiful thing in the world

I havent seen or spoken to you in 2 months. When the moment you smiled and said a word to me, I’m not sure what I should really feel. Should I feel grateful that at last you spoke and smiled at me? Or should I feel happy and at peace when you smiled and spoke to me? I dont know… At that moment, I felt happy yet I feel like a knife just struck my heart and it’s the same painful feeling I used to get from you in the past.

Time has passed but my feelings for you hasnt changed a bit. I couldnt believe it that it has been three full years since the day I laid my eyes on your beautiful being which is you. Three years? I couldnt believe it myself. After all the rejections and my stupid actions, I still couldnt get myself to let go of you. Yes, I’ve been courting other girls but unfortunately, these girls are either taken or I’m not their type even though I have a considerable feelings for them. But no matter how strong I feel for those girls, somehow my feelings for you seems to be stronger than the feelings I have for them. It may be because I havent completely forgotten about you and devote myself to those girls (I mean to any one of them). There are a handful whom I actually really like  but they dont have that one thing that you have and that is what that makes you so special… I do believe that there is something rather special about a person that only another could feel and see in that person. And because of the specal thing that causes another to fall in love with that person. It can be felt and touched but not seen and is strongly related to loving that person.

That is the special thing I see in you that I dont see in other girls but unfortunately, I dont have the words to describe it. Even if I’m lucky to be with any girl at the moment, I’m not sure wether I will have the same feeling as I have for you. I know getting another girl may not solve my problem but that is the only option I have left to get you out of my heart, my mind and my soul…

I always think that you could make me a better person in all aspects but you didnt give me a chance to prove me wrong. Through all the conversations I had with you, you said you trust me but somehow I feel there is a wall that you’ve set up from me to get to know the real and whole you. I guess this is the common sheild that most girls set up to protect themselves.

I do have a proposition for you… I dare you to care. I dare you to trust me. I dare you to love me. Are you up to it?

You always leaving hanging, hanging for wanting more of you… I always remind myself of you told me last time. You told me that we’d be just friends and nothing more but I still can accept that. Is that the truth that I have to accept ? If it is, then we’d be friends till death do us part.

I could never find another girl like you. They cant make me feel that same way I feel for you. The reasons why I can remember things about us is because you made them special no matter how small they are. I know it kind of freaks you out but I cant help not remembering them. Whenever I recall them, I smile yet my heart aches. It’s weird, isnt it ? Now, I feel that we’re apart, not as close as we use to be. Each conversation feels awkward. From stuttering to converse with you has made me to think properly before I utter a word, scared a wrong word will be said. All these things drive me crazy just thinking about you. Shall I just say ‘Hi’ with a smile and leave or stay and have a chat ? Shall I message you hoping you will reply me ? Shall I call you hoping you are free to  talk ? But now, I understand. Your life is more hectic than mine and you are determine to get your work done unlike me who keeps procrastinating my work and not doing well in the end. At times, I’ll help you when I know you need some and I’m glad I’m able to do something that would make you happy even for a moment. You’ve made a mark in my life but have I made a mark in your’s ? I hope so one day… Whenever it is…

We are going through our separate lives doing our own things. I pray that one day, we would cross paths again and meet each other. Till then, take care always.

All my life, I feel that my life has been planned out for me. Pre-school, junior high and high school… But now its university life. I gotta choose the correct path I love the most cause this is my future. Our future just like any other people out that… But lately, I dont know what I wanna do with my life. I mean I dont know what I wanna do now or in the near future but I aint got time. so I could say I’m practically stuck in my current state doing what I’m doing now. Just so you know, I’m taking a banking and finance course and I’m in my 3rd sem of my 2nd year. I got another year left 2 go and now I gotta prepare my thesis. God knows how I’m gonna do it since business is not so my thing. Damn myself cos I should have taken a hands-on course instead. But what can I do now ? Just have to continue wit it… Sigh… We know that no one else knows their selves better than we ourselves. And I know I learn faster by doing it with body than my brains. Sad to say but thats just a fact. For example, I have the ability to dance but not the talent. I can catch up dance moves easy but I dont have the creativity to think of new dance moves. Sorry DC members for letting y’all down…

Here’s another thing. I think I cud do better if I could just find a catalyst for my life. Whoever she is or whatever it is that would spark my life up, add some torque and make me go like I’ve never gone before. Before this in junior high n high school, i had my hommies and that part of every kids’ life is to go to school. When I came out, i was too damn stupid to figure out what I wanna do wit ma life… Then I met this person out of the blues. Man, she’s was DA BOMB. Believe me… She made me so happy till I cant remember the last time I was that happy (with a girl I mean). She was ma fuel to move n ma O2 to breathe but I lost her. When that happened, it sucked big time. Since then, I was just living ma life as it is but worse. I made stupid decisions and cause arguments outta nothing which led to worser things… Now, I have no idea what I’m doing. All I know is that I’m studying on ma skinny ass just for the sake of grad’ing. People keep telling me to put in more effort and get good grades but I dont feel them. i know I gotta make ma parents happy and obviously I gotta support them when I start working. But God knows whether I can grad wit good/bad grads and get a job after that…

Please, help me find that ‘thing’ to spark my life, to complete my life… I found it once but lost it. i think if I cud find it once again, it could very much make my life a better life for me to live in…

Your beauty makes my heart skip a beat,
Every time our eyes meet.
Your beauty is my delight,
Your beauty knows no height.

Your beauty is in your eyes,
Which sunk the deep blue skies.
Your beauty will never fade,
Cause you’re the best thing that God has made.
Your beauty is like the sun shining in the day,

When I look at you, I can’t look away.
Your beauty is in your smile,
It makes a second with you worthwhile.

Your beauty is in your hair,
Your beauty has none to compare.
Your beauty is a sign,
Of how lucky I am if you were mine. 

The feeling of love should be expressed constantly… But how do you tell someone those three simple words ? It’s useless as telling someone something and proving it to them are totally on different wavelengths. In the end, its all up to time, how you use it, what you do with it and so on, no-one can rush you, but taking too long could lose the thing you hold dearest to your heart.

“Love” Love is a strong feeling that is so powerful that it can control you. There are many effects that love has for example love can hurt you so bad that you can make bad decisions like hurting someone, killing yourself or even killing someone or hurting the person you love the most. When you’re in love, happiness and sadness come to you. At first, it’s the happiest day of your life but when it ends, it feels more painful than death or anything else. When you lose that someone, you lose everything, you lose faith and trust. It’s hard to trust in another person you’ll never love somebody like you loved that someone. The beautiful thing about love is the feeling that you get when you’re with that person. The strong feeling you get when your lips touches her or his lips, it feels like you are rising to the happiest place or seeing you child when he is born or even better you forget about all the problems in your life. Its you and that someone. It feels beautiful loving someone and it also feels beautiful being loved by the person you love the most. In a relationship, you always have to have trust. With no trust, it will never work out. Love is like a bright red rose and it ends like a horrible black rose. When the rose dies, you die but from within. Losing your love its like losing your heart. With no heart, why keep living if all you’re going to do is suffer and that’s every man’s weakness. People tell me, "Eric, you’re very strong" and I tell them, “Being strong is not everything. I could be strong but it’s no good to me because I am weak from my heart”. Like they say, love is pain and pain is love.

Sometimes, in our relentless efforts to
find the person we LoVe,
we fail to recognize & appreciate the
people who LoVe us.

We miss out on so many beautiful things
& simply because
we allow ourselves to been slaved by
our own selfish concerns.

Go for the man of deeds & not for the
man of words
for you will find rewarding happiness
Not with the man you LoVe
but the man who LoVes you more.

The best LoVers are those who are
capable of
LoVing from a distance,
far enough to allow the other person to
grow,
but never too far to feel the LoVe deep
within your being.

To let go of someone doesn’t mean you
have to stop LoVing,
it only means that you allow that
person to find his own happiness
without expecting him to come back.

Letting go is not just setting the
other person free,
but it is also setting yourself free
from all bitterness, hatred, & anger
that keep in your heart.

Do not let the bitterness rare away
your strength & weaken your faith &
never allow pain to dishearten you,
but rather let you grow with wisdom in
bearing it.

You may found peace in just LoVing
someone from a distance not expecting
anything in return.

But be careful, for this can sustain
life but can never give enough room for
us to grow.

We can all survive with just beautiful
memories of the past but real peace &
happiness come only with open
acceptance of what reality is today.

There comes a time in our lives when we
chance upon someone so nice & beautiful
and we just find ourselves getting so
intensely attracted to that person.

This feeling soon become a part of our
everyday lives & eventually consumes
our thoughts & actions…

The sad part of it is when we begin to
realize that this person feels nothing
more for us than just a friendship.

We start our desperate attempt to get
noticed & be closer but in the end our
efforts are still unrewarded & we end
up being sorry for ourselves.

You don’t have to forget someone you
LoVe.
What you need to learn is how to accept
the verdict of reality without being
bitter or sorry for yourself.

Believe me; you would be better off
giving that dedication & LoVe to
someone more deserving.

Don’t let your heart run your life, be
sensible & let your mind speak for
itself.

Listen not only to your feelings but to
reason as well.

Always remember that if you lose
someone today,
it means that someone better is coming
tomorrow:

If you lose LoVe that doesn’t mean that
you failed in LoVe.

Cry, if you have to, but make it sure
that the tears wash away the hurt & the
bitterness that the past has left with
you.

Let go of yesterday & LoVe will find
its way back to you & when it does,
pray that it may be the LoVe that will
stay & last a lifetime.

Have you done something so bad and wrong that you cant rest peacefully ? Your stupidity made you do that s*** till you’re so scared that your friendship with that person is so fragile that at any moment of time you may just lose that friendship because of your attempts to repair it and even your stupidity may come in the way again…

Man, it sucks to know that the friendship may not have any future. You really enjoy that friendship with that person but you cant at the moment. You’re just wishing that the friendship would be the same as it used to with all the funny and happy conversations moments… When that person says everything is alright, deep down inside of you still thinks that its not. Is it normal and alright to think that way ? Or is it just in your mind ? Damn…

Everyday I keep praying that this special friendship is repairable and has a future to look forward to. Its hard to find friends and friendships that are good and that you enjoy…

I’d hold you so tight
In my arms tonight
I’d kiss your face so fair!
With my love and care

I’d tell you
How much I loved you
I’d look into your eyes
Till forever I closed my eyes
In your lap I’d put my head
To make you rub my hair and head
I’d kiss your lovely hands
While sitting on the sands
I’d make you believed
It was only you who live’
In my heart so deep
And I’d love you so much till I live’
If I’d only one night left to live!